Gaz in Wonderland
by duskhunter2
Summary: Gaz has been having strange dreams for longer than she can remember, but a mad chase after a certain Game Slave stealing robot and a thoughtless leap into a strange portal turn her reality into the odd world that could only result from a mix between Alice's and her own. Rated T just in case, you never know what I could throw in later.
1. An Almost Ordinary Morning

**Gaz in Wonderland**

Chapter one- An Almost Ordinary Morning

* * *

Gaz Membrane awoke feeling tired and irritated as always, her head was pounding and it felt as if she hadn't gotten any sleep at all. Last night, like many before that one, ha been plaugued with nightmares which she couldn't quite remember upon waking. Not tht it mattered, she just shook it off and climbed out of bed before preparing herself for the long day ahead. Gaz Membrane was no whiner. She got dressed in her usual attire, (a plain black dress with grey striped sleeves, pink stripped tights and of course, her trademark skull necklace.) brushed her hair, (the ends stayed down for almost a minute before springing back into thier usual shape) and then headed into the kitchen in search of food. When she got there she noticed an unopened can of poop soda, which she decided to pocket before Dib could find and drink it. And then she poured herself some breakfast meaties cereal an h a peice of toast before realizing that she had left her Game Slave in her room- which she reached just in time to see a small figure jumping out the window- her Game Slave 2 clutched in it's tiny silver hands.

* * *

A.N. - Well, what did you think? This is a collab. between my sister and I. I wrote this first chapter at 4:00 so I apologize for any obvious mistakes. Oh, and this is our first story so please don't be to harsh. :c


	2. Down the Rabbit Hole

**Chapter 2 - Down the "Rabbit Hole"**

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"GIVE ME BACK MY GAME SLAVE!" Gaz screamed as she chased Gir, a wave of pure anger was coursing through her very soul as she drew closer to the obnoxious robot who was foolish enough to touch HER Game Slave 2. "WEEEEEEEE!" Gir squeeled happily in response before jumping down an ominiously glowing hole in the ground. Gaz was to blinded by anger to think about the possible consequences that jumping through the hole might bring, and at the moment she really didn't care. She jumped after Gir and was immediatly plunged into a thick darkness. After a short while of falling candles and little membrane lamps began to appear mid-fall and rise up past her, adding small patches of light to the bleak and dreadful fall. Not long after that she noticed several other odd objects floating past her as well- mini moose,vampire piggies,little alien ships,bacon soap, skool desks and various other random furniture. Although she didn't really care, she was used to the randomness that often took place around her. She just continued to fall, cross-armed and scowling until she finally landed on a cold,hard checker board floor. She got up and looked around. Behind her was a small table, in front of her was a purple door with the Irken symbol on that the room was quite bare. "What is this place?" She asked herself aloud. "The passage room." A voice replyed and Scoodge now stood by the door dressed as a guard. "And that's as far as you'll b going, no non-Irkens are aloud past this point." Gaz growled and a darker (if it was even possible.) look crossed over her face. "I'm looking for Zim's STUPID robot. I AM getting past this door. Now MOVE, unless of course you have a death wish." Skoodge stood his ground despite her warning. She growled once more before grabbing him by his lekku and throwing him into a nearby wall and hitting the bulls-eye on the target which just so happened to be there. The moment Skoodge hit the center she heard an eerie creakng noise and turned to see the now opened door. A look of triumph upon her face she made her way to the opened door.


	3. I found Myself in Wonderland

Chapter 3- I Found Myself in Wonderland

Gaz blinked several times in the far to bright sun-shine and then looked around at the sickeningly cheery and still somehow very meaty world. There were mushrooms and meat, as well as flowers and birds and an assortment of the strangest plants and creatures you had ever seen. Some of them plants were puns or play on words (cat-er-piller, jelly-fish,butter-cup) and it was all completely ridiculus. After a few minutes of walking through this nightmare of a world she notice Gir, sitting on a mushroom eating a waffle. Apparently he noticed her as well, because he dropped his waffle and ran off down the long crooked path, squeeling happily once more. "What is wrong with that robot?" She wondered aloud before chasing him down again, but just a little ways into the dense forest she was stopped mid-run by two of the most annoying characters in the entire whole of the series. Iggins and Keef. "Fuck!" Gaz thought to herself. "Where are you going?" Iggins asked as the two intentionally blocked her path. "I'm following Gir, now get the fuck out of my way!" "Awww someones cranky! I know what'll cheer you up! A story about curiousity!" Keef said with his obnoxious voice. Gaz growled once more as she tried to push past the idiots who stood in her way, but she simply couldn't seem to find a way around them. "Fine, make it quick." She said through clenched teeth.


	4. The Frylord and the Tabledrone

Chapter 4- The fry-lord and the table-drone

A.N.: The tune to this song is the one from the original Alice in Wonderland (Disney's). The fry lord is Sizz-lorr -from the episode: the frycook what came from all that space. And the table drone is Bob, from the episode Hobo 13.

"The story is called: The fry-lord and the Table-drone." Keef said "Or the story of the curious plooka." Iggins added. Music started playing out of no where and Keef and Iggins broke into song, much to Gaz's (and everyone elses') annoyance.

"The sun was shining on the sea  
Shining with all his might  
He did his very best to make  
The billows smooth and bright  
And this was odd because it was  
The middle of the night

The Fry-lord and the Table-drone  
Were walking close at hand  
The beach was wide  
From side to side  
But much too full of sand

"Mr. Fry-lord," said the table-drone  
"My lekku begin to perk  
We'll sweep this clear in half a year  
If you don't mind the work."

"Work? The time has come," the Fry-lord said  
"To talk of other things  
Of shoes and ships and tasty snacks  
Of nachos and The Tallest  
And why the sea is boiling hot  
And whether pigs have wings (Gaz growled, stupid vampire piggies!)  
Calloo-Callay  
No work today!  
We're nachos and the tallest"

Oh, uh, Plooka, come and walk with us  
The day is warm and bright  
A pleasant walk  
A pleasant talk  
Would be a sheer delight  
Yes, and should we get hungry on the way  
We'll stop and, uh, have a bite?

But Mother Plooka winked her eye  
And shook her hairy head  
She knew too well  
This was no time to leave her Plooka bed  
"The sea is nice,  
Take my advice  
And stay right here," Mum said

Yes, yes, of course, of course, but, uh, ha, ha  
The time has come, my little friends  
To talk of other things  
Of shoes and ships and tasty snacks  
Of nachos and the tallest  
And why the sea is boiling hot  
And whether pigs have wings, ha ha  
Callo-Callay  
Come, run away  
With nachos and The Tallest!

Well, now, uh, let me see  
Ah, a loaf of bread is  
What we chiefly need!  
Listen, how about some pepper and salt and vinegar, eh?  
Well, yes, yes, splendid idea, ha ha!  
Very good, indeed  
Now, if your ready, Plooka, dear.  
We can begin the feed.  
Feed?

Oh, yes, the time has come, my little friends  
To talk of food and things  
Of peppercorns and mustard seeds  
And other seasonings!  
We'll mix 'em all together  
In a sauce that's fit for The Tallest  
Calloo-Callay  
We'll eat today  
Like Nachos and The Tallest!

I, uh, weep for you. I (hic), oh excuse me  
I deeply sympathise  
For I've enjoyed your company, oh much more  
Than you realize  
Little Plooka? Little Plooka?

But answer, there came none  
And this was scarcely odd because  
They'd been eaten  
Every one!"

The song finally ended after what seemed like forever. "That was a complete waste of time. Do you know how far that stupid robot could have gotten with my Game Slave by now? I should kill you both, but fortunatly for you I'm in a rush." And so she beat them up very quickly and continued on through the forest of mushrooms and meats.


	5. Quiet Smeet!

Chapter 5 - Quite smeet!

"Finally!" After what had seemed like ages of endless wandering Gaz had found a small clearing, in which a small group of Irkens sat. Not wanting to waste anymore time to long, pointless stops she looked around for something that would work as a diguise. she found some icky green mud and sticks."Well, this sucks." She smeared the mud all over her exposed skin and jammed the sticks in her hair hoping they would be stupid enough to fall for the crappy, last-minute disguise and just let her pass. She walked into the open rather quickly and was tip-toeing as fast as she could. She had almost made it past the small clearing when *SNAP* she had stepped on an old dried twig. She winced. Three of the Irkens (the ones nearest the sound) turned towards the source of the noise with perked lekku. They kind of just stared at her for a moment taking in her awkward appearence. and then they burst out laughing. Beneath the green Gaz was bright red, making her look all the more ridiculus. "You didn't actually think you would fool us did you? You're covered in mud for Tallest sakes!" Tak said with her british accent. "You're filthy!" Zee said with a disgusted look on her face "And look at your clothes! They're covered with human filth!" Tenn added "I think she's pretty!" A small smeet chimed in. "Quite smeet!" Tak demanded as she pushed the small Irken behind her and out of sight. Gaz reminded herself why she was in this horid place and, although it took a great amount of self-restraint did not beat the crud out of the whipped the mud off of her face and hands and ran off down the path ahead- Cii the smeet following right behind her.


End file.
